feeling jaded

Dec 15
I’ve been feeling homesick lately… this has been THE slowest week of my life.

I think that fear of the unknown is starting to set in a little bit. The way that I feel right now is the same way that I felt right before leaving for Firenze over three months ago… very apprehensive. I am so used to life here, and friends here, and family here and am anxious to see how all these new things are going to fit into my old life at home. I feel like I’ve worked myself up into a frenzy thinking about how things will be the same but different from before.

Last night I could not sleep for the life of me and today, after sweating my butt off at the gym for a looong time, I packed. I know we have 6 days left but I feel overwhelmed about the millions of things I have to accomplish before leaving and thought that maybe packing would set my nerves at ease a little bit. It did. So that’s good.

I think that the way I feel is showing in my face because today at lunch my family asked me about a million times if I was okay. Physically I’m fine (for once). Mentally, um, I’m a little bit concerned about myself but I’m working through it and am sure that once finals are almost over I’ll be myself again.

I also pulled out my US cell phone today, dusted it off, and charged it. I’m so used to my Europe phone; it’s crazy how foreign it looked to me!

PS. I heard today that a friend of mine’s dad passed away yesterday… I feel terrible about it and hope that she and her family are doing alright. :(